The resistance to the word No in response to your desire manifests itself at a very young age, doesn't it? It's one of the first signs of a toddler's growing independence. Unfortunately, it's something that you never completely mature out of, even as an adult. Some times, when God says No, it's fairly easy to understand why - perhaps that financial windfall would have led to a sense of pride, or that A on a test that you didn't study for would encourage your tendency towards procrastination and lack of self-discipline. But the hardest Nos to hear are when you desire a good thing. I recently went through a miscarriage that tore my heart up. As soon as I began to sense that things were not going normally, I fell to my knees in serious prayer - asking God for a miracle, desperately asking that he might allow me to keep the baby that I already loved and wanted. These fervent prayers and frantic pleas lasted for days. The utter stillness and quiet tormented me. Eventually, though, God provided an answer, and that answer was No. I don't understand why, right now, and my heart still hurts. But what I do know, and what I hold onto, is to be found in the Word of the Lord.
Praying for you Melissa
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